Why do we need to care so much? Why do we need to talk to people and get involved in their messy lives and make ours messier? Why do we need to need others, let them matter so much to us, when the end of the day, they end up hurting us? Why do we consider that the more people a person cares or is cared about, the better they are? Do we really need to be so interdependant? People hurt each other, people mess up each other, raise hopes and let them down brutally, accidentally or not. We get distracted for a while when something shiny and new comes along, something that catches our eyes or tugs our hearts, and we chase it for a while. But then, it withers and is gone again, the pattern repeats itself over and over again. Are we really that stupid? How is growing these emotions of ours in any way good? They blossom, full of hope and joy and love, and then something goes wrong. Something always goes wrong. And it burns. All gone, down the rubbish-hole and start from scratch, again. When is it ever enough? When do we learn to stop?!? How do we know that this golden sunshine we search for isn’t fools gold, a shiny bauble on a string daring us ahead, tempting us onwards, a false hope that we somehow live for, live through all this useless, senseless pain! What is the point? Why haven’t we ever just …let go?
January 24, 2013